Well, um, I wouldn't say no...

Listening to: 'No One' by Alicia Keys [As I Am]

OK yes I know you're expecting an Alicia Keys/birthday post, and it'll come soon, I promise. But in the meantime, let the floozy in me entertain you.

So you know how you have celebrity crushes, yeah? Most of them are considered 'normal' for someone in your position...you know, Brad Pitt/Johnny Depp/Scarlett Johansson/Jessica Alba kinda normal. And then there are some, that make you think "err, really?". But you can't help it. There's something about them that makes you go weak in spite of yourself. And so, ladies and gentleboys, in the spirit of baring my soul (and ridiculing myself) in cyberspace, I present to you my weird and so-wrong-but-oh-so-right celebrity crushes! Drum roll please...

No, I will not call you "Daddy"!

I used to fancy him when he was younger, so this is kinda OK, right? OK maybe not really. But...aney, look at him. Just Look. At. Him. Isn't he adorable? I ♥'d you then at 30, Gary Lineker...and I ♥ you now at (almost) 50. Sigh.

The grey hair ain't so bad!

But I'm straight (I think)!

If any woman can turn me, Sienna Miller can. I dunno, she's just so...cool (for lack of a better word). I love her style, her hair, her eyes, her accent, and she's gorgeous, and charming, and sexy, and...OK I'll stop.

I want your dimples! (and your boyfriend)

Please sing, but don't talk.

Listening to Plan B's interviews makes me feel like I'm on a council estate. But I love his music (as I've said before), and there's something about him that oozes 'sexy'.

You're a chav, but I don't mind.

One must accept that Prince Charming is a figment of one's imagination...

...but Prince Harry isn't! Yes yes I know he's ginger, and I know everyone seems to fancy William, but Will's so boring! Not to mention he's going bald. Harry's got a full head of hair, and he's got the 'preppy bad boy' rep down to a fine art. Such a turn on. And who can say no to an army man? *swoon*

Can I get you a towel, your Highness?

If only you were human!

Eww no it's not what you think, pervert. Well, not technically, anyway. This is a really old crush...possibly my first. I remember being jealous of Miss Piggy, especially when watching the movie of them in Manhattan (can't remember anything about the movie except that I was jealous). And why wouldn't I be, eh? Kermit is perfect (if just a little bit too green).

If I kiss you, will you turn into a prince?

I'm not a paedo, ok?

Now I was worried about this one, but I checked Wikipedia and he's 16 (only just, but still...legal is legal, right?) so I'm safe. Still, I'm not gonna include a pic here 'cos they would've all been taken when he was underage and I'm starting to feel quite dirty while typing this bit so I'll stop now. But, um, yeah. Tom Daley *cough*. Read this if you don't know who he is.
I should add some kind of pic for this bit though, so I'll just add one of the other toy boy I had in mind...Zac Efron.

Need some help with that t-shirt?

*Sigh*, I'm so going to hell.

UPDATE: When I first typed this up, I thought of making it one of those tag thingamajigs (we haven't had one in a while) but I didn't think anyone would relish the opportunity to embarrass themselves in this manner, so I left it. But looking at the 2nd comment below, I was wrong. And since I'm physically incapable of refusing Sabby, I hereby christen this post a tag thingamajig. Tag, Sabby, you're it! Of course it's also open to anyone else who wishes to partake.