Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Wanted: The Voice I Had Four Years Ago

Listening to: 'Touch The Sky' by Kanye West ft. Lupe Fiasco [Late Registration]

Practice was awful...my throat hurts. I sound like a frog. A strangled frog. Gone are the days when I could hit a top G and sound good. Gone are the days when my top C could be heard outside the auditorium. Failure. And out of the people coming on Saturday, those who have heard me sing, heard me four years ago...so they're gonna think I'm actually decent. Fat chance. I'm going to croak, the microphone's gonna give up and die and no one's gonna hear me...which might be a good thing actually. Hot water and Lemon & Ginger Tea are high on my "To Drink" list, but I'm afraid that might not be enough to save me.

Moving on...

RAG Blind Date. Woohoo!!! You think. I think not. The fear of being stood up has championed once again, and while my friends are probably engaging in highly intellectually stimulating conversations (...not) with their dates, I'm typing in a blog entry. Way to go Me. Going to dinner/a club with a random guy you've probably only seen before in Sainsbury's (and on Facebook) doesn't sound that appealing to me, to be honest. Most people fib on their entry forms anyway. And others send their friends to 'assess the suitability of the candidate' before showing their faces. "Oh it's all for a laugh, and it's for charity...it's not serious!" They all say. Hmm...I wonder if they'd be as enthusiastic and casual about it if their 'date' turned out to be an absolute minger with a mouth like a sewer and a personality similar to that of a doorknob, who lied on their form 'cos "it's all for a laugh". I think not. OK, so I chickened out. Yes I can hear you saying "you'll never know if you don't try". Maybe I don't want to try. Maybe I enjoy being miserable and lonely. People have told me that before...maybe they were right. Aaargh I wish people wouldn't try and coax me into doing things that I want to, but am afraid of doing. I'll never submit, it's not in my nature to be forced to do things. Instead I'll sit around trying to convince myself that opting out was a good idea.

On other matters, application form submitted. Now it's thumb-twiddling time. Whoo-pee.

Was listening to Radio 1 yesterday, due to lack of lectures. The Magic Numbers were on Jo Whiley's show, as a promo for The Brits. They did a cover of Franz Ferdinand's "Take Me Out" which I thought was stellar! Should be able to listen to the whole show here, for about a week. The last bit of the song is especially good, in my opinion.

Right, I should go and write some boring essays in the hope that I'll get some funding for this PhD. That's if I don't fall asleep first.

Till we meet again...


  1. your voice will be fine. but I know how you feel you dont use it, u seem to lose it....but coming from experience, all it takes is singing with the radio again and a few good scale singing sessions in the privacy of your bedroom and you'll be great.

  2. did you listen to my radio show on mon? if yo udidnt, you sdhould have. anyhoo, you owuld have been proud of me - i dissed the whole rag blind date so much, you would have felt way better.

    is it just a phase or are you normally this cynical in literary form? cos in real life, you are a lot more optimistic :)


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